Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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