He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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