but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
