So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
