The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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