we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
its liver damage thursday
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
