Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
