i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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