he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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