Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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