I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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