and you said cock pushups were impossible
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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