I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I just blew my weed a kiss
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
