Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
