He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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