i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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