you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
