Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
