Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
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