oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
