guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
