And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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