I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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