Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'm just crazy horny about you
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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