Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Randomize
