I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
