you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
It's blow job season.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
