i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
