"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
