There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
