I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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