I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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