Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Are we still banned from the library?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
