thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
