Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
