Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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