Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize