he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
