These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
