youre lurking in front of me
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
