nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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