I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
