You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'm sobbing to NWA
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
