WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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