Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
