i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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