in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You need a sexual gate keeper
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize