Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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