well most of my day revolves around power hour
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
