God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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