Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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